Talking About Graphic or Upsetting Content

Seeing something upsetting online can have a real impact on how young people feel. Read on to support your child with calm, open conversations that build understanding, resilience, and emotional safety.

Graphic or upsetting content can be hard to avoid online. Talking about it helps your child understand their reactions, protect their wellbeing, and know they can come to you for support.

What to know

Graphic or upsetting content is part of the online environment and young people may come across it even if they’re not looking for it. In fact, most young people don't go looking for this kind of content, but it can often be shared unexpectedly, through friends or peers, or when something is trending and being shared widely.

Graphic or upsetting content is material that may be violent, disturbing, shocking or emotionally intense.

It can include:

violent or distressing videos
real-world events shared online
shocking or graphic images
content designed to shock or provoke a reaction

Because it can be unexpected and intense, it may affect how a young person feels both in the moment and afterwards.

It’s important not to assume that your child will tell you straight away if they've seen something, as many young people fear they will get into trouble, and face punishment or blame if they speak up.

What helps most is supporting your child to recognise when something feels uncomfortable, understand their emotional reactions and how they can respond in the moment (for example feeling confident stepping away) and knowing they can talk to you about how it's affecting them. A calm, supportive relationship makes a big difference in how young people process and recover from these experiences.

Top tips for talking about it

Start with reassurance, not alarm

It’s common for young people to come across upsetting content online, sometimes accidentally, sometimes through friends or trending posts. Starting the conversation in a calm, reassuring way helps your child feel safe, rather than worried they’ve done something wrong.

You might say:

“Sometimes people come across things online that can be a bit shocking or upsetting.”
“Have you ever seen something online that stuck with you?”
“What do people your age do when that happens?”

A calm, reassuring start helps your child feel safe to talk about difficult or upsetting experiences.

Normalise that it can happen and how it can feel

Young people may not expect to see graphic or distressing content, and when they do, it can have a real emotional impact. They might feel shocked or unsettled, confused or curious, upset, scared, or unable to “unsee” it. Letting them know these reactions are normal can reduce anxiety and isolation.

You might say:

“It’s normal to feel a bit shaken by things like that.”
“Some things online can stick in your mind for a while.”
“How did it make you feel when you saw it?”

Normalising emotional reactions helps your child process what they’ve seen without feeling alone or overwhelmed.

Help them understand why this content exists and spreads

Graphic or upsetting content often spreads because it shocks people, grabs attention or is shared quickly in group chats or social media. Helping your child understand this can reduce the urge to keep looking or sharing.

You might say:

“Sometimes content is shared because it gets a strong reaction.”
“Why do you think people pass things like that on?”
“Do you think people always realise the impact?”

Understanding why content spreads helps young people step back rather than get pulled in.

Encourage them to pause and step away

When something upsetting appears, young people might feel drawn to keep watching or clicking even if it makes them uncomfortable. Let them know it’s okay to scroll past, close the app and take a break.

You might say:

“You don’t have to keep watching something that doesn’t feel good.”
“It’s okay to close it and take a break.”
“What helps you reset after seeing something like that?”

Giving permission to step away helps your child protect their wellbeing in the moment.

Talk about sharing and responsibility

Young people may receive graphic content in group chats or from friends, and feel unsure what to do. It’s important to talk about why they shouldn't pass on harmful content, to think about how it might affect others and to respect people’s dignity and privacy.

You might say:

“How would you feel if something upsetting was shared about you or someone you know?”
“What do you think is okay or not okay to share?”
“What would you do if someone sent something like that in a group chat?”

Thinking about the impact on others helps young people make safer choices about what they share.

Create space to talk about what they’ve seen

Sometimes young people carry what they’ve seen without talking about it and creating space for them to process helps reduce ongoing distress. You don’t need to jump to trying to fix it, most often listening is enough.

You might say:

“If something ever sticks with you, you can talk to me about it.”
“You don’t have to deal with that kind of stuff on your own.”
“What helps you feel better after seeing something upsetting?”

Talking things through can help reduce the impact of upsetting content and support emotional wellbeing.

Keep the focus on feeling safe and supported

The goal isn’t to make your child fearful of being online, it’s to help them feel confident managing what they might come across. Reassure them that they’re not in trouble for seeing something, they can always talk to you and support is available if they need it.

You might say:

“If something online ever worries you, I’m here to listen.”
“You’re not in trouble for coming across something.”
“We can always talk things through together.”

Feeling safe and supported makes it easier for your child to ask for help when they need it.

Bonus Conversation Starters

These questions don’t need to be asked all at once. One small conversation at a time can help build awareness over time.

“Have you ever seen something online that felt a bit shocking or upsetting?”
“What do people usually do when that happens?”
“Why do you think people share that kind of content?”
“How do you know when something isn’t good to keep watching?”
“What helps you feel better after seeing something like that?”
“What would you do if someone sent something upsetting in a group chat?”
“Do people talk about what’s okay to share?”
“Who could you talk to if something stuck with you?”
“What advice would you give a friend in that situation?”
“What helps you decide when to scroll past something?”

If you're concerned...

If your child comes across something that makes them feel uncomfortable or upset, the most important thing is that they feel able to step away and talk about it.

Encourage them to:

pause and take a break
avoid rewatching or sharing
check in with how they’re feeling
talk to someone they trust

You might say:

“You don’t have to keep looking at something that makes you uncomfortable.”
“It’s okay to step away and take a break.”
“I’m here if you want to talk about anything you’ve seen.”

Keeping this simple and supportive helps your child feel more in control.

You can't rely on trying to control everything your child sees online to support them. Staying calm, open, and connected helps them manage what they come across, and feel confident asking for support when they need it.